As I listened to the sermon, my mind was racing.
I haven't done enough. I need to do more.
Our preacher was preaching from this scripture, "As the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without deeds is dead. James 2:26
Suddenly, my mind was filled with thoughts of guilt. I wasn't doing enough good deeds. I needed to do more.
The message was packed with goodness, however, I interpreted it wrong in my heart.
Instead of praying and asking God to let the message speak to me, I quickly jumped into my own interpretation of it.
Those thoughts lasted throughout the day.
As I sat next to a sweet mother in the stands of watching our girls play volleyball, I was once again pounded with guilt.
This mother has 3 adopted children. On top of the slew of biological children she is already raising.
I listened to her as she talked about some hardships with one of her adopted children. Instead of listening intently to her pain, I was focused on my own guilt. My lack of deeds. My not doing enough pity party.
Here she was raising an army of children, and here I was doing what?
This morning as I was in my Bible, God spoke to me. Words I needed to hear. Words I could have heard yesterday if I would have talked to Him, sought Him, prayed to Him.
I know that guilt is never from Him. Ever.
Conviction is good and healthy. Guilt is deadly and poisonous.
I began to write in my prayer journal and this scripture just breathed right into my lungs...
"If you are faithful in little things, you will be faithful in large ones. But if you are dishonest in little things, you won't be honest with greater responsibilities. Luke 16:10
As I pondered those words, my heart began to see my life differently. I began to see my little home and my little family. I pictured Lem, my husband, and my two children.
Was I being faithful in this area? Was I doing my best in being a faithful wife and mother?
Peace washed over me.
God has called me to this place. Right here.
He has not called me to be in a thousand other places. At least not right now.
If I take my attention off of my family and the many needs here, I would not be faithful to my call here.
God has me here. In this season.
Seeing my life in this way takes the pressure off. It takes the guilt off and throws it into an ocean of mercy.
God has many good deeds planned for me to do right here. In my home. On my little street. In our little town. Among the people right under my nose.
These deeds will probably never get noticed publicly, with applaud and ringing affirmation...
But God sees.
He sees the small and faithful things we do each day.
He sees us waking up early to get some time in with Him. Tiptoeing into the kitchen to pour that first cup of coffee and praying the little ones stay sleeping.
Preparing lunches. Scrubbing the dishes. Emptying the dishwasher. Washing clothes. Folding clothes. Paying bills. Driving to work day in and day out. Helping with homework. Carpooling kids. Sitting on bleachers until your bottom is numb. Cheering on kids as they play sports.
And, it matters.
You may not realize it now, but some day you will.
The impact you have on your family is bigger than you can ever imagine.
Your presence means a whole lot to those people around you.
Your faithfulness in your seemingly mundane tasks are important.
These deeds that you do every single day are building a foundation for God's Kingdom.
God's economy is different than the world's economy. Little things are big things.
Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” Matthew 19:14
He sees the heart. He sees what we do not see.
Keep up your good deeds, sweet friend.
Taking care of that sweet family of yours is making a difference.
LORD, you alone are my portion and my cup; you make my lot secure. The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance. Psalm 16:5-6
back to the dishes,