Mar 26, 2020

The Cup...

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Memory Scripture: The Lord is my Shepherd, I have all that I need. Psalm 23:1


Day 11. 

I feel ashamed.

I see now, what I did not see then.

The busy. 

The chaos. 

The averting of the eyes because I just did not have time to talk. 

The quick, "God bless him", every time I would see my homeless friend walking. 

The missed opportunities. Over and over. 

The importance of things that were not important. 


I feel ashamed.

I see now, what I did not see then.

Through this time, this quiet, this rest, this unknown....

God shows me more in the unknown than I ever could see in the "known".

I passed him again today on my walk. My daughter said, "Mom, there he is."

Today, I had time.

I had plenty of time.

What else is there to do these days anyway?

We talked to him, my homeless friend.

He asked where I had been....

I had no answer as my cheeks flushed pink...

"Too busy...I guess...." My words trailed off.

I feel ashamed.

He was thirsty and I could tell. He asked if I could get him a cup...

A cup....

I was standing on Holy Ground.

But those who drink the water I give will never be thirsty again. It becomes a fresh, bubbling spring within them, giving them eternal life.” John 4:14

I was near my house....I told him I would be back with a cup.

Scrounging up some food and water and toiletries....all I could find to help him get through the next week or so, I was ashamed.

I hesitated before throwing in my last roll of clorox wipes.

Lord, forgive me. I am selfish and self-centered. 

The homeless man said he needed nothing, and he was right.

It was me that needed something....

A whole lot of something. Something like mercy, compassion, sacrifice...

Yet, here I was pausing before putting my clorox wipes in a bag for him.

I feel ashamed.

My daughter and I took the bag of things back to him.

He was grateful.

Oh, so grateful.

He has nothing.

I have so much more.

Yet, he is the grateful one.

I had just prayed for the last two days for God to open my eyes. Show me who needs You, Lord. Help me to help others. 

And yet, the irony...

It was me who needed help.

As we are quarantined to our homes...

I see it as a blessing now.

My homeless friend has a van (that does not run) for a home.

The library he spends hours on end in, is closed indefinitely.

Yet, I am complaining about being stuck in a home with water, and food, and children, and pets and air conditioning and warm beds, and laughter and people....

I feel ashamed.

But, He is changing me.

Ripping away the ingratitude, the pride, the self-centeredness....

He is doing a work here. And I am grateful.

My homeless friend has no idea that he is the blessed one.

So grateful. And simple. And has time to talk to others. Not rushing about...averting the eyes.

Change me, Lord. Glue my spiritual eyes open, and help me to see. 



handing over my cup,


jill










Good News...

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