Aug 29, 2012

Wednesday SHINE....

Today's Reading: Micah 3

Happy Worship Wednesday, SHINE girls!

We have a very special guest blogger today. My long time friend, Danielle Copeland, is sharing a part of her incredible testimony.

She and I have had countless conversations because we bond with similar struggles. Through the years, I have seen Danielle grow stronger and stronger in her faith walk and her dependency on Christ. 

It has been a beautiful thing to watch unfold. (tears!)

Danielle is beautiful, talented, and the most fun person to hang out with. She and I share a love for all things shopping and fashion oriented. So, I totally love hanging with this girl. ;)

Sit back, grab your coffee and be blessed by Danielle's journey.

Tuesday SHINE:
by: Danielle Copeland

Hi SHINE Girls!

When Jill first asked me a month ago to do a post I didn’t know what to think.  What did I have to say?

Yes, I am a Christian…Yes, I go to church…Yes, I have my quiet time…but I was a mess.

Plain and simple. 

You see I struggle with fear and anxiety on a daily {sometimes hourly} basis. It has been a part of me for 20 years this September – something I want to get rid of desperately.  I have tried therapist after therapist to no avail. I have leaned on friends and family only to frustrate them. The one person I needed to go to was God – I knew this, but I didn’t want to give up my control in handling this.  I didn’t think he was “real” enough to handle my fear. It was too big.

I have prayed, read books, memorized scripture, sang praise songs but I did not give it to God. You see, I was scared that if I gave it to Him completely I would lose control.  He would make my worst fears come true to teach me a lesson in trusting Him.

Satan had me in the tightest hold you could get. 

One that almost tore my marriage apart.

One that almost destroyed friendships.

One that almost damaged my ability to mother my kids.

Almost.

But guess what? Satan is NOT going to control me and I am not going to control him or my fear.
One of my greatest fears is me or my kids getting sick.  The actual fear “emetophobia” is another post…another day. But this fear has controlled my life for 20 years.  Until now.

My sweet boy started preschool yesterday.  I am not scared that he is not going to like it or he is going miss me.  He is going to love it!  What I am scared of are all the germs he is going to be around and possibly bring home.  This fear caused me to pull him out of preschool last year after a month.  But yesterday was a NEW DAY!


Eli & Me 
You see in my search and talks with God over the past month I have prayed that he would protect us.  That he would take my fear away.  That he would heal me. Fervently I prayed for this.

But I was also doing this:

  • Calling the preschool to see how they cleaned the toys and how they handled sick children.
  • Teaching Eli how to religiously wash his hands.
  • Buying new vitamins and probiotics.
  • Reading Psalm 91 and claiming it over my home.
  • Obsessing over the Facebook posts of friend’s kids who were sick.

Now most of you would think that this wasn’t a big deal.  Each of these things is smart and proactive.  But I wasn’t doing just that – I was trying to sideline God and control it still.

My son’s favorite song is Our God by Chris Tomlin.  He asks to hear it every day. 

Our God is greater, our God is stronger
God You are higher than any other
Our God is Healer, awesome and power
Our God, Our God.
Our God. My God.

As I was standing in church on Sunday, the band started playing this song.  For some reason I listened to it differently. 

And if Our God is for us, then who could ever stop us
And if our God is with us, then what can stand against?
And if Our God is for us, then who can ever stop us
And if our God is with us, then what can stand against?
Then what can stand against?
Then what can stand against?

What can stand against us?? It was like God was speaking just to me in this crowd of hundreds.  Tears poured down my face as I realized I am not alone in this.  God is in control – thankfully.  Not me. 
I realized that Eli {my sweet 3 year old} has been singing this song in my ear for the past year.  I thought it was cute and endearing but never really listened to what he was saying. Change the words sweet SHINE girls…

MY God is greater.
MY God is stronger.
My God is Healer.
My God is with me.
What can stand against me?

I wept and wept as I imagined His face looking down at me and saying – Sweetheart, let go.  I have this.  I am YOUR God.  I am big enough. I am great enough. Nothing can stand in my way.

The band ended that song and started another – Mighty to Save by Hillsong.

Savior, He can move the mountains,
My God is Mighty to save,
He is Mighty to save.

Forever, Author of salvation,
He rose and conquered the grave,
Jesus conquered the grave.

So take me as You find me,
All my fears and failures,
Fill my life again.
Give my life to follow
Everything I believe in,
So I surrender.
I surrender

Girls, I am surrendering. 

My 36th birthday was on Saturday.  God spoke to me on Sunday…the start of my week…my new life.  This fear has controlled me for 20 years but no longer.  I know it’s not going to be easy but I am giving it to God.  He is big enough.  He can move those mountains of fear.  He conquered the grave.  He can fill my life – not fear. 

My new life is here. 

Join me in this journey.  Whatever you are struggling with – fear, anxiety, depression, guilt, bitterness, unforgiveness.  HE IS BIG ENOUGH.  He can walk with you. He can carry you.  He can heal you. 

I command you – be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.
Joshua 1:9

As Lee and I drove Eli to school yesterday morning guess what came on the radio? Not a cd I put in but the radio.
Our God by Chris Tomlin. J


Eli & Me walking into school yesterday

Girls – God knows exactly where you are and what you need.  I am grabbing his hand like Eli grabbed mine this morning and walking with Him.

xoxo
Danielle


My family

24 comments:

  1. Praise God for green pastures, my precious Friend! Standing in full agreement with you on this.
    I'm picturing you stepping put of the boat to meet Jesus on the water like Peter - keep your eyes on Him and your hopes will be realized.
    Love you.so.much!!

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    1. Thank you for always pushing me and supporting me!! <3 you much!

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  2. This was awesome. One of my favorite phrases from Joyce Meyer (if I've posted it here before sorry -- but I think it all the time) is:

    Do it Afraid.

    Fears will always be there but we just need to act. Like you did with your son. The more we do things in spite of our fearful thoughts -- the easier it gets.

    Your son is going to love this year.

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    1. Thank you - I am going to remember this!! DO IT AFRAID. Done. :)

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  3. Anonymous8/29/2012

    Omg. Thank you for your wonderful post. I actually have the same fear of germs. I worry everyday of one of my children getting sick at school. I have so much anxiety and worry over every little thing. It is time for me to take the Lords hand and let go also. Thank you so much.

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    1. Will be praying for you as you surrender and give it to Him. You can do this!!

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  4. Anonymous8/29/2012

    This post hit home with me as I have battled fear most of my life and it can cripple you. I have to be very deliberate in my daily walk to "Let Go and Let God". It is also a control issue believing that as long as you hold on to it - you can handle it when the opposite is actually the truth. I can actually say that at the times I have turned it over to God.....it freed me for that moment. What a wonderful feeling but it will creep back in to be dealt with daily. My weapon against it is to feed myself spiritually daily. That gives me the strength to turn it over to God. As the above post says "Do It Afraid" holds so much truth....it will get easier.

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    1. Isn't it amazing to let God handle it? I will be praying for you as well. Please keep me in your prayers too. <3

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  5. Anonymous8/29/2012

    Give it all to God he's there for us and always will be.I love to release my fears to him daily sometimes several times a day. Of course talking to God everyday is joyful I look forward to our one to one talks.

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    1. I need to remember to release my fear over to him every day. Thanks for supporting me! :)

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  6. Anonymous8/29/2012

    So true, a great post!

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  7. Cynthia Colbert8/29/2012

    You are so wonderful and strong. You can do this, I know you will do this and I will pray for God to continue to give you the strength and love to win!

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    1. Thanks Aunt Cyndi! Thank you for always supporting me and praying for me. Love you much!

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  8. I SO could have written this post!!! I have the exact same fear...my children sit with me in Church on Sunday morning's because of this fear! I'm terrified of germs...especially the stomach bug! I've come a long way over the past year, but it's still there. Thank you for posting this! He is SO amazing! Praying for strength to also let go...

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    1. Michelle - we should be prayer partners in this journey! We could walk this walk together. Email me at danleecopeland@gmail.com if you want to partner up. <3

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    2. Oh, that would be so wonderful Danielle!!! I will send you an email soon! Thank you!!!!!

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  9. I am so sorry for you ladies, especially Moms, that deal with this. I have my own fears, but this is not one of them so I can't really relate. I have, however, endured the death of my two year daughter and still don't fear my other kids getting sick or hurt. I think it's just a gift of faith that God has simply given me, not something I try to attain.

    However, one thing I have found that works well with the fears I do have is to take my greatest fear, whatever it is, and say to myself, "what if...... (fill in your greatest fear here) happens, then what?" If you continue to ask yourself this question all the way out to the worst case scenario--- even if your child dies or your husband leaves you or you lose your house---you realize you really WILL be okay. It's that age old premise that "what we fear is fear itself". God gives us grace for our realities, not our imaginations.

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    1. What I have finally figured out is that we all have different areas in our life where we are fearful or bitter or angry. We can learn together how to walk with God and give it to Him. I will definitely try and remember this the next time I am fearful. We will all be okay when God is in control! <3

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  10. Woo Hoo!!! Danielle!!! Woo Hoo!!! What a declaration of Faith in our Mighty God!!! Mighty to Save!!! Mighty to Deliver!!! If He is with us...who can stand against us? I may have shared this but I must again...when I just absolutely have done all I can do...in order to totally Trust that wonderful LORD and Master of mine...I hear...Can you add one cubit? Can you grow one hair? Can you change any of this? My answer as always is No, LORD!!! But, You Can!!!!!!! And with You in me...I can do all things!!! I am more than a conqueror in JESUS!!!! Woo HOO!!!! And, I love that that little prophet...Elijah!!!!!...sang prophesy to his mama everyday until she let go!!!! Glorrrrryyyyyy!!!! Out of the mouth of babes!!!!!! They are His heritage...given to us as gifts!!!!! as rewards!!!!! From this side now...Mama still and forever I will be...and white headed as I can be...an bringing up grand girls in the admonition of the LORD!!! Love Wednesdays, Jill!!!!! AWANA day!!! We haven't gone yet...it began 2 weeks ago...and, I missed the first night. Last week...I was with my son picking up my grand girl...now living with him (pray for us) ...tonight we go to Hebron...Caleb named the mountain called giant...Hebron...when he conquered it at 80...and I will take 3 into the house of the LORD tonight!!! Woo Hoo!!!!! Amen and Amen...answered prayer galore!!!! Woo Hoo!!!!! :D <3

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    1. WOOHOO!!! That is right Aunt Teddi! :) Thank you for your prayers, support and chats. <3

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  11. Sweet Danielle, Oh how encouraging your walk is to me. I am so grateful for the new things we can learn when our circumstances and problems may not be new at all. I am praying for continued and consistent peace and hope for you.

    The Lord so wants us to allow Him to work in our lives, handing over the control each day. I lock arms with you, giving our lives and our walk, thoughts and children to Him. HE IS ABLE, always and especially when we are not.

    I love you, sweet friend.
    Beka

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    1. Thanks Bek - so thankful for your support in all of this especially last fall. I could not have done it without God and my team. (you included) Thanks for walking with me. Much love! <3

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    2. Anonymous8/31/2012

      Thank you for this post! I really needed to read that!!! I don't have the fear of germs, but I often suffer from the fear of something happening to me and leaving my children behind. I battle with this fear EVERY SINGLE day! Thank you for the reminder that God is greater and that I just need to give this fear to Him!!! Thank you!

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Your comments are welcome!